mmmmmmmmmmm eeaarrtthhquake
but seriously, if you're going to wake me up at 5:30 in the fucking morning, can you at least do it with some flair? Lets get with the program here MN, don't waste my time with these piddly little 5.2 magnitude pussy quakes anymore... I want the next one to split the U.S. in TWAIN! Maybe have yellowstone blow up or something tragically awesome.
I don't want to be woken up by another quake that does "minimal damage" ever again, just don't waste my time!
Sincerely,
me
